i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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