News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
There r osticjed everywhere
Semen is not good for contacts.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
