That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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