school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
