Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
