We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
