He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
