You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize