Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
