If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Randomize
