Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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