Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
You may now shotgun with the bride
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize
