Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
