My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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