I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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