And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Ladies don't puke and tell
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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