Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
