I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
