Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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