How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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