lets start a swedish sibling band together
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
