I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
