Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
