Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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