I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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