i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
