At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
there was a trapeze. enough said
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
