If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
