Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Randomize
