wanna go halves on a baby?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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