so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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