I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
