During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
