I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
