dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
