I want to stick my p in your. b.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
