party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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