that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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