butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
