So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize