More tranny stories later!
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
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