the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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