He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
