yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
