ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
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