Non-Jews are for practice
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
