Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
