Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
