Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Randomize
