You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
